Stepford Mommies

This morning, as I was working my way through my to-do list: schedule camp check ups; call surgeon with last-minute questions; cancel Boston Globe subscription; and read file before work call, I had one of the morning "news" shows on mute in the background. I noticed on the ticker at the bottom of the screen that some uber-successful mommy blogger was coming on to discuss her failed marriage and of course her new book. Then I saw her: perfectly coiffed blonde, not a hair, tooth, or piece of flab out of place. I had many thoughts, one of which was "How about they flip the script for a change and try this: Matt Lauer will be interviewing a harried working mom, who does not have the luxury of sitting home in her PJs making money by sharing advice on which baby stroller or formula to buy. This mom has spent decades commuting full time and only got off that train after her father died, and in anticipation of her autistic son's entry to middle school. This mom does not have perfectly coiffed blond hair, but she does have crooked teeth and dark circles under her eyes. Her hair wouldn't know how to behave if a four star general commanded it to. This mom spent a solid month of ten and twelve hour days in a NYC hospital after her father's lung cancer surgery, to make sure the doctors and nurses there did not abuse or kill him. She held work meetings at the StArbuck's across the street to keep from falling behind at work and getting fired. In the process, she managed to be her office's single most productive employee. Before each morning's journey to the hospital, she kissed her kids and her husban, and left him to carry the heavier home load. She tried to remember to thank him, but probably forgot, in her exhaustion. She attended school conferences, SEPTA meetings, recitals and anything else that was about parental obligation. Her dark circles grew bigger. She continued to keep journals about her kids, which she had done since each was born. The oldest is now eighteen, and the journal writing continues, albeit more sporadically. She finds more joy in the kindness of her kids to one another and the embrace of her husband than most people find in conquering Everest. She saves kind emails from friends and colleagues because they make her smile, and lift her up on down days. And she never, ever expects to get a call for a TV interview from Matt Lauer."