Moving at Warp Speed

I continue to be surprised at myself, at how I seem to skip over things that are really significant. I am trying to rectify that here, albeit a bit belatedly. I went back to work full-time, five weeks ago. I am so tired from it that I feel literally drained. Stick a pin in me and nothing will come out. Whatever was propping me up leaked away. I'm not doing manual labor, toiling in a coal mine, but I don't think I could be more exhausted if I were. My day begins shortly after 6 a.m. I arrive at work before 8 a.m. and I have typically been leaving the office around 6p.m., without leaving the building during the day. There have been so many meetings, and the pace is so quick. So many people to get to know, so many programs with which to familiarize myself, so many acronyms to master. It all just feels overwhelming. And I just feel too old to start over like this. And yet... I feel very energized by the work, by the expectations. There is too much to do, too much to keep track of. But I want to do it. I want to do well. I want the people who hired me to be glad they did. And that is a good feeling, at my age and stage of life. I am so pleased that I started this job while two of my kids were in camp. Though I feel the loss of summer leisure a bit, juggling this and the start of a new school year at the same time simply would have been untenable. At least with summer under my belt, I will arrive at fall a bit out of the starting gate at work, and hopefully less stressed on the home and school fronts. In the end, I am grateful to have this chance. But I also understand why government seems to attract so many youngish types. They not only have the ambition, they have the energy. This pace is not made for folks of a certain age, comme moi...